Welcome to your ‘’ultimate’’ year.
The one that is anything but normal. A year where people cried and spent several sleepless nights. Some have lost their beloved ones, others have lost their homes. Ironically, the lucky ones were those who saw their country burning, its citizens suffering, its walls collapsing, and yet were lucky enough to survive it all. Nevertheless, the survivors have lost so much and felt like they will never be the same people ever again. They were right about that.
A country in crisis, along with some of the worst possible conditions towards the COVID-19 outbreak, a governmentless nation, as well as the country where the third biggest explosion – and the biggest non-nuclear one – in history took place. Lebanon has really shifted from a country of wealth, health, parties and positivity to a void of nothingness, cries and despair.
Last week, a friend asked me whether our current situation is a phase or our new reality, I reflected about this contradictory question.
I heard some people saying that the country is going through a temporary phase. For them, it was just a bad dream, one they will soon wake up from. Personally, I viewed things in a different perspective: I felt numb, stripped of all the hope in me. My faith in returning to my past life simply faded away.
Every drop of blood. Every tear shed. Every broken heart. Every lost person. Every injustice. It all made me give up on trying to change the external factors and to control and predict how our conditions will turn out. My voice fails to speak out loud so here I am transmitting my message through my writings:
“Dear Citizens of Lebanon, you are a solid base. You proved it through your resilience, your strength, and your courage. You always stood tall in the face of adversity.
I hear you asking yourselves: “Lebanon, can we fall in love with you again?”
My family, you will if, and only if, you find your own way back. You are the base needed for this country in order to rebuild it properly. Older generations failed Lebanon because they might have been working and putting efforts in the most ineffective ways possible. I understand that after losing so much this year, you may have lost yourself too. But here I am to tell you today that this period of time is not a phase anymore. I believed it too. Apparently, opening my eyes and accepting the ugly truth was the only way to stop myself from believing the beautiful lies. We used to live in a world of smoke and mirrors. Today, our reality has changed. However, remember that you will not stay this depressed and helpless. You are the new generation that will work in a better and more effective way than your past generation did.
I want you to promise me to forget about the exterior factors and focus all your attention towards changing the interior ones. I want you to always look for the things that make you happy on a consistent basis. Meditate, call someone you love, do sports, cook; do whatever brings you joy. I want you to feel again, to try and get past the numbness caused by the shattering events that happened around you.
“I felt so much that I started to feel nothing.”
Your numbness is a result of all the suffering inside your hearts. Even with your broken soul, be strong. Find the power to feel again, and allow yourself to experience the good emotions too, not just the bad ones. Work on your wealth and health. Read that book, eat nutritiously, open that business, develop your thoughts. Work on finding your own closure. I understand that you are in need of multiple explanations today toward the events that happened around you.
You need justice for Beirut, for the explosion’s victims.
You need to figure out why our economy is breaking, why our people are dying and the reason for the corruption.
You might also be looking for the reason why we were even born here in the first place.
The harsh truth is that you will not get any of these explanations.
Stop hoping and start working towards finding your own closure in your personal way.
It is only once you have rebuilt yourselves to the point that you’re ready and confident, that your reality will become a passed phase.
Falling in love with Lebanon again is all you will experience. Fellow citizens, while we, the base of Lebanon, fortify ourselves and work towards becoming better men and women, this country will get better with time.
You will build this piece of heaven and soar his wings again only for it to fly far and remind the whole planet who are Lebanon and its citizens.”