As my birthday was approaching, I took a look at the last two years of my life. They were not a big excitement for me. Surrounded by my beloved who used to get so excited for this “special event” of mine, I used to perceive it as a one-year-closer-to-death event. I’m not saying that I was never excited about “my day”, but if I were to take a minute and think about it, it was just about the events and the meaning behind them. My mind was always thinking: “One year older”. At this point I have barely scratched the surface. Here are some of my afterthoughts:
One more year of my life has passed.
One that I will never get back.
One more year of my youth has gone by.
One more year of additional responsibilities and hard work.
One more year of broken hopes because of the toughness of life that is coming my way.
One more year of my beloved life has flown by.
One more year of sleepless nights and crying till dawn arriving.
One more year of instability, events of unsteadiness that are to take place in my life and in others’.
All these feelings and senses used to invade my mind during the two to three days preceding my birthday. I used to overthink a lot, looking at my friends and telling them that I’m not very excited for this event. Eventually whenever this day came, we would have the most fun and only the beautiful distractions could make me forget all the chaos and storm destroying the excitement in my head.
“One year older is a chance for you to get wiser”
After having taken some time for myself in order to reflect on it all, I realized that those past thoughts can be turned into actions. As a matter of fact, they can show up any day of the year and will not wait for your birthday to make their appearance. It’s just mindfulness playing with you. When you are aware that a new year of your life has started, you just focus on putting the blame on it. Time is the most important concept since the creation of mankind but how to use it for your benefit is all on you. Converting my thoughts into new ones because the way I perceive this “time” of the year is my full responsibility.
This “special day” shouldn’t be our worst nightmare. However, we have two opportunities on this day.
The first one is the fact that we have a special gift called “gratefulness”; we have the chance to be thankful for our past life.
It is true that your life and your beloved ones’ seem to pass by at the speed of light.
Nevertheless, be thankful for it.
Life rewarded you with a new day,
A new chance to make up for all your past mistakes.
A new day to be the happiest person you have ever been.
A new opportunity to be thankful about all the experiences and events that have happened so far.
The second one is your chance for a change of perspective.
You have the opportunity to see this event through another eye.
“In youth we learn, in age we understand”.
– Marie Von Ebner Eschenbach
Every time you blow the candles out, you blow out a year of failures but of achievements too.
Mistakes as well as things done right.
Stupid actions as well as wiser thoughts.
Heartbreaks as well as heart-fulfilling moments.
Deceptions as well as acceptance.
Sadness as well as lessons.
Hardships as well as success.
“Our wrinkles are our medals of the passage of life. They are what we have been through and who we want to be.”
– Lauren Hutton
I am truly thankful for all these years, for they have blessed me with the amazing people that surround me, which makes for a well deserving life. At the end of the day, it’s not the years in your life that counts, it’s the life in your years that does. As I blow my candles out this year, a new light of determination in my life will be lightened because this year I’m ready for my birthday.
I’m ready to face every challenge that will come my way. Every hard truth rising to the surface that I will have to accept. I’m ready for all that I will have to encounter. My eyes will be wide open towards all the lessons I’ll have to learn. And my hands fully open for all the opportunities I’ll have to grab.
Thank you for the twenty years that has shaped my mind and the upcoming years that will perfect it. Life, you have done me right.